[My little darling, Leo de Catrio]
It has been some kind of a day today...from the beginning to the (almost) end. I woke up this morning thinking about a couple of women I sponsored who have gone AWOL. One I haven't talked to in several weeks and the other 2 it's been a month plus. One is a youngish chronic relapser and the other 2 are older women. As the day wore on, I was contacted by all 3 of them. 1 drank a couple of drinks, but didn't get drunk. Does that mean anything? (lol) 1 is obviously using and told me I didn't make her feel special enough, and this wasn't helping her. (LMAO) and the other is a woman who relapsed after 20+ years, and knows what she needs to be doing, but refuses to do it. SHE called to check on me and see how I was doing. :)
I was talking with a close friend tonight and said, I told them all I'm not that kind of sponsor. I don't chase after people. If you want this--fine. If you don't --fine. What do I care? This isn't for people who need it, it's for people who want it. If you want it and are willing to do the work, I'll go to hell and back for you. But don't waste my time ...I'm a busy woman. If you don't want to stop drinking, then go drink. Have a ball.
She was laughing her head off.
I told her that that's just the sponsor school I went to. And when I was new, I was 10 pounds of crazy in an 8 pound bag too. But I never for a minute thought somebody else was going to do this for me. And even today, I don't live in that delusion, ever, that maybe it could be different. Because alcohol takes me places I don't want to go. And believe me, NOBODY wants to go there with me. lol
All this made me very grateful. So grateful, in fact, that I signed up on a new-ish site called 365 days of Grace in Small Things. And every day you write 5 things that grace your life, that you are blessed by. I thought it was such a grand idea, I sent it to everyone I know! Just another way to do a daily gratitude list... This is the stuff that changes the world....
All told, it's been a really super day. I was blessed to get some exercise to EXORCISE my cabin-fever demons by walking the babydawg out in the snow around the house a few laps. She was such a delight to watch as she jumped into snow drifts, dug holes in the snow (no doubt looking for snow monsters), and just lookd absolutely ecstatic about being out there with me. Tomorrow we go get the stitches out. The doc wants a look-see, just because the gash was so bad. It has healed nicely. A blessing!
I fixed baked chicken and stuffing with butternut squash and pickled beets from my garden for supper, so the oven running warmed the house up even more while it filled the place with mouth watering aromas. Twice blessed there. We had a relatively healthy supper and filled our tummies. So--thrice blessed!
I'm getting sleepy, so I need to finish up here. We are having supper with the neighbors tomorrow, unless something changes. They are retired and such lovely people...he has hurt his back. He was doing better, but today when I called to see what I could bring, she sounded worried about maybe having to call it off. I said if she did it would be fine, we'll do it another time. (This is the rescheduled one now, lol. But they are in their middle 70's I think at least, and these things happen.)
Wishing each and every one of you a day filled with all the blessings life has to offer:
And leave the rest to God.