Sunday, May 10, 2009

Mothers Day Sunday

Today I watched in fascination as people who were out and about celebrated a day set aside to honor their moms. There were little girls all dressed up carrying presents with ribbons streaming. There were young men standing in line buying hanging baskets full of colorful petunias and begonias and all sort and sundry flower combinations. There were young girls with babies on their hips, obviously enjoying their very first holiday. The restaurants were all filled to capacity.

All this for the women who gave us life. Who attended to our every need and whim for a whole lot of years. Who [hopefully] guided us and taught us and encouraged us. Seems like a small payment in return for a lifetime of service. lol

I have cried through a lot of Mothers Days in my time...either because of the situation with my own son or because of the loss of my own mother. It's one of those holidays that for me was always a double edged sword.

The past decade or so has seen a big change in my Mothers day, although it's surely never been as bad as I seem to remember. Mostly me, getting carried away in an emotional typhoon...

I'm blessed today to have a relationship with that son. A good relationship. And never mind that I don't get to see him as often as I would like...the time we do spend together is quality time, and I am seriously grateful for that. And I know I have AA to thank for it.

I'm blessed to have made peace with and forgiven my long dead alcoholic mother. Again--I have AA to thank for that.

I'm blessed to have a husband of 17 years who said to me one Mothers day, way back...I wish you were the mother of my children. (He has none). A husband who said to me a couple of days ago, Do I need to call your son and remind him it's MD ? I met this boy in an AA meeting and fell instantly head over heels in love with him. No wonder....

I realize that every thing good in my life is thanks to this blueprint for living we get in this Alcoholics Anonymous program. I thank my Creator and I thank you, all the members of these 12 Step Groups everywhere, for teaching me that I was lovable, and that I could repair the relationships in my life, and that I never had to live like that ever again...If I didn't want to. You truly loved me until I could love myself, and you took this drunk by the hand and walked her through her life, saying "If you want what we have, then do what we did." And by that grace that saves us all, I haven't had to pour booze into this hole in my face for a really long time.

Thank you for my life.


Namaste.

2 comments:

Andrew said...

You are welcome.

And thank you Dear One for all that you are and all that you do.

Love

Andrew.

Hope said...

Beautiful.