Friday, February 1, 2013

A new month...

February.  Heart month.

 Music is the song the heart sings. All beautiful, yearning, tearful, happy, tragic  melodies.  Our hearts swell with gratitude and love. They break with sorrow and loss. They patch themselves back together again, stronger than ever. And always, always, willing to risk again.  Willing to open as wide as possible to let the love and the life in and maybe even the pain.  And they physically pump the blood and oxygen around to feed all parts of our bodies to keep us going, until one day they don't. I had a friend who used to say there's really only one thing people die from.  A broken heart. One that doesn't work anymore. No one is dead until their heart stops. 

 We are really afraid of the risks that we take a lot of the time, but we take them anyway. Because we have the faith that there is something better, something magnificent waiting for us on the other side of fear. Sometimes we are right. Sometimes we are not. But we don't give up, not us, intrepid beings that we are --always hoping, always believing, always trusting.

And as a result of that blind faith ...something that we don't really share (I don't think) with anyone else in the animal kingdom...we carry on.  We try again.  We yearn for the eternal spring --a time of regneration, new growth and new beginnings.  And we make our lives work and we nest and we take one step at a time, one day at a time...and we don't give up. 

Unless our hearts get broken beyond repair. Then we say goodbye. Either temporarily or forever.


My dad's birthday was February 3rd, 1925.  Our dad is always our first love, I think. Our protector, our rock, our provider. Usually. Mine was, and I'm grateful for that. He's the measuring stick we use to size up every other man in our life forever.   My husband's birthday is February 8, 1960. He is a lot like my dad in some ways, not so much in others. My dad never knew him, but I promise you he would have loved him. So, 2 important men in my life, both with connections to this heart month. He was not my first husband, but he will be my last. He was my only dad.  Both of these men have filled my heart with equal amounts of love and pain, and  both have shown me love like nothing I can measure. 

 This post hasn't been what I thought it was going to be, but I think that I will spend the entire month of February posting about love.  I think that I will sing my love song as best I know how, and trust that it will nourish me in ways that only love can.  In the end, love is all there is.  Can I post about love for a whole month,  even a shorter-than-usual one ?  Maybe.  Can I write love letters to the ones I care about and even some to the ones I don't know yet ?  Probably.  Do I want to believe that love is the answer ?  Definitely.

 Most definitely.



Namaste.

100 comments:

Ashling said...

What a beautiful, and (if you'll forgive the pun) truly heart-felt post. Those two men are/were blessed to be so loved, and I look forward to reading your February posts!

Akannie said...

Oh Ash...so glad to see you out and about again. I'm heading over to your place now! xoxoxox

Beth said...

A lovely post Annie! I will be looking forward to your posts about love this month!

Akannie said...

Thank you, Beth...Your love story is quite beautiful too...

the wild magnolia said...

Love is a worthy subject. It is good to love and be loved.

Good post.

Akannie said...

I agree, Wild Magnolia...maybe the MOST worthy subject ever.

It IS good to love and be loved.

Andrew said...

Part of Ardis' death certificate lists ' Broken Hearted Syndrome ' as a contributing factor to her sudden death.

Without a healthy, loving heart free from that which leads to fear we are not whole.

Cloudia said...

good post



Sending Aloha to YOU
from Honolulu,
Comfort Spiral
~ > < } } ( ° >

Akannie said...

Oh, Andrew...I miss Ardis so much. You are right...love trumps fear...every time.

Akannie said...

Dearest Cloudia !!

Aloha back to you!!

DJan said...

If there are any of my blogging friends who could write about love for an entire month, it would be you, Annie. Your big heart is filled with love. I read a quote yesterday that made me think of you: "The word happiness would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness." Love is definitely in the air during this month. I sure do love your blog.

Mariodacatsmom said...

What a great post. I agree with DJan above - you can do it and do it from the heart and it will be beautiful.

Mama Pea said...

Simply a beautiful post.

Akannie said...

Oh DJan...such sweet words from such a wonderful woman. Bless you...

Akannie said...

Thank you MDCM...by golly--I CAN do it ! lol

Akannie said...

Thank you, Mama Pea.

Are you guys warming up a little up there??

Mama Pea said...

N-n-n-no, although warmer weather is in the forecast. -14 last night and a high of 11 above today. With a bit of a wind. Made it kinda "bitey" out there today!

Teresa Evangeline said...

Hafiz says love is the only thing we should be talking about, forever and ever. Your plan sounds perfect to me. :)

Akannie said...

Oh Teresa...I love Hafiz. I have his "Every child has known God..." poem on my desktop now...

Mary LA said...

Yes to Hafiz and Rumi and Burns' 'My love is like a red red rose' and all the rest of the poetry and music and magic.

And for the Irishman on his birthday, there's Anne Bradstreet 'To My Dear and Loving Husband':


If ever two were one, then surely we.
If ever man were loved by wife, then thee.
If ever wife was happy in a man,
Compare with me, ye women, if you can.
I prize thy love more than whole mines of gold,
Or all the riches that the East doth hold.
My love is such that rivers cannot quench,
Nor ought but love from thee give recompense.
Thy love is such I can no way repay;
The heavens reward thee manifold, I pray.
Then while we live, in love let’s so persever,
That when we live no more, we may live ever.

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