Saturday, January 30, 2010

Saturday at the circus

...Not here, we aren't. We've enough clowns to fill one of those tents where they just keep piling out, one right after another!!

I have never been to the circus. I bemoan this fact, because my heart is in the circus. When I was a kid, I always wanted to be part of a high wire trapeze act. I wanted to be a clown. I wanted to be anything that traveled the world in colorful tents and had weird people as a part of it, because then I thought I could blend right in. Plus, I LOVE elephants.

I grew up in a big family with a lot of kids and never enough money. So, anytime the circus came to town, we never got to go, because when you have 6 kids, every little thing turns into a whole lot of money to do it. That includes things like...movies, circuses, eating out, and nearly anything else you can think of. We could go to the incredible St. Louis Zoo, because it was free. We could take road trips, all of us locked in that giant Ford station wagon, to see the pretty sights. (Right). My dad would load us up and drive up the Great River Road to see the Piassa Bird that the Indians had painted on the bluff. We'd watch regattas on the river and go mushroom hunting and sometimes fishing and picnicking.

But we never got to go to the circus. And sometimes I want to go now, but the timing's never right or we're in no position to go just then or something. Always something. But someday I'm going to sit in the Big Tent and watch the horses and the trapeze artists and the clowns and the elephants and it'll be one of the best days of my entire life.

Today was a very good day. The Irishman took me to town for a speaker meeting/breakfast and then we came home. Not long afterwards, I had a houseful of friends who came to spend a couple of hours with me. We had a great time talking about recovery and doing the things we do...some of them left, and some stayed later and the Irishman went to the Winterfires Coffeehouse that we had planned to attend LAST weekend, before it was rescheduled for this weekend...making it impossible for me to attend because of the surgery. The 4 of us that stayed behind had a lovely impromptu supper of creamy potato soup and thick slices of honey-oatmeal-flax seed bread that I baked last night, slathered with real butter. By candlelight. It always impresses people that we eat by candlelight so much at our house. lol I just love it. We had some stimulating conversation about food and meals and the nature of nurturing ourselves through these activities. It was delightful.

Now everyone's gone home and the Irishman has returned and after about an hour of chatting, he's off to the shower. I am ready to hit the's been a long day and I'm pooped. Today I got to see quite a few people that I haven't seen in a while and it was good. I got to hear a speaker that I am the sponsor of her sponsor's sponsor. lol

The knee is much better today and even starting to itch a little under the pressure bandage...which is always a sure sign that some healing is happening.

The dogs had a grand day running and playing like crazy in the beautiful sunshine. They always ham it up when we have company, and today was no exception. They live for this stuff.

I am leaving this page, grateful for friendships, grateful for life and so, so grateful for love. I'm going to go read in bed for a while and let that Irish guy know that I am more in love with him than I have ever been. That he is the best thing that ever happened to me. And that I would marry him again in a heartbeat...Almost 18 years together and he still makes me laugh and he still engages me in stimulating conversation, and I still care about how he thinks and feels about things. It's still all shiny new with us.

Isn't THAT a miracle???????



Susan said...

The last paragraph was just beautiful. I hope he reads it! Yes, itching is a sign of healing. I'm glad your recovery is going well.

Hope said...

Yes, it is! That is wonderful.
I'm glad your knee is on the mend, too.

DJan said...

Yes, it's wonderful that you are still in love with the Irishman, and he with you. But a miracle? I think it takes commitment and determination. And I'm glad to hear that knee is healing up. Love the candlelight dinner!

Carol said...

There are beautiful books out by Kate Braestrup, the most recent titled Marraige and Other Acts of Charity. She compares the state of marraige to a very small monastery of two who cannot afford to let differences divide them. Her other one, If You Need Me, is about being a chaplain for the forest service in Maine.

As a nurse, I am thrilled at your recovery. And I love your meals.

TechnoBabe said...

The day my mother drove all those miles to pick me up and take me back to where she was living so I could live with her after being in foster homes 5 years, she surprised me with an itch to explore in a town neither of us had been in and we found a circus and bought tickets and that was my first time to see a circus! I was 17. So I do understand the kid in you wanting to fulfill the desire to spend the magical time at the circus. I do so hope your wish is filled soon.

Anonymous said...

Ahhhh, your post is so uplifting today! It's good to know that your wound is healing well.
Sending warm hugs and wishes for a beautiful and peaceful Sunday! xoxoxoxo

Kathy M. said...

That is a miracle. I love your blog. So overflowing with goodness and generosity and gratitude. It's how I imagine your home to be. I hope you get to the circus. Hugs.

Enchanted Oak said...

You and I both have never gone to the circus. But I got to ride an elephant once at a carnival. Elephants are really WIDE. Your love of 18 years sounds a lot like my love of 18 years. And I agree with you, it is miraculous that drunks like us are able in sobriety to love someone in such a healthy way.

Cabo said...

Go to the circus and take that irish guy. If you don't end up buying popcorn and snorting while you laugh, THAT will be the miracle. :)