Monday, May 11, 2020

It's a Monday that seems to match the world.


  The weather is strange. Grey, chilly and windy.  Doesn't seem like the second week of May. We had a frost warning 2 nights ago. Daytime temps are stuck in the low 50's.  I have had several phone calls of late from people freaking out about life in general. Lots of tears. Some anger. Lots of fear.  We are on the 52nd day of our statewide sheltering in place directive. The streets are mostly devoid of traffic. The stores are limited to  10 people at a time, and many of them are not following guidelines.  I try to only go out when it's absolutely necessary, and always wear a mask and gloves.  The death toll from this (at this writing) is over 80,000.  Some folks are handling this surreal scenario better than others. Some are delusional.  We are seeing insanity as never seen before in this country... armed protesters marching on state capitols.  People killing each other over nothing. A delusional leader of this country, spreading misinformation and outright lies about everything going on, who is encouraging hate and violence every single day.  It's no wonder there are so many people on the verge of breaking down.

  I am so lucky to live out here where I do. My biggest concerns are not running out of bird seed and suet blocks.  I have enough of every thing I need to keep my family safe and fed.  My needs are pretty simple these days.  The 2 people I love more than anything in the world are right here with me and they are both well.  Most all of the other people I also love are okay so far.  A little deranged maybe, but well and safe.  And I am becoming a little deranged myself...not sleeping  well, talking to myself and the dogs and cats, (ok-- that's nothing new, but still  lol ) feeling like I have lost my anchor in everyday life.  Not sure what I mean by that, but that's what came out.   Everything is surreal. Some days I wander around the house not knowing what to do next. There's plenty to be done, but I am not motivated to do it.  I have been making bread and baking desserts and even started a batch of sourdough. I am cooking ham and beans today (I found a hamhock in the freezer)  and will try a sourdough cornbread  for the first time. Wish me luck.

  I am watching an Australian drama series that is a wonderful commentary on life in the 1950's  Set in '53 (the year I was born, btw) titled  A Place to Call Home.  I am really liking it.  It airs on the Ovation channel on Monday mornings, 4 back to back episodes.  I dvr it and watch a show a day through the week. I'm really loving it.  I'd buy the set, but the affordable ones won't play on American dvd players apparently.  And the others are a little out of my league.  lol  We are watching more tv than we ever have I think.  It's okay... just weird.  I haven't done nearly as much reading as I would have thought. I am a serious reader... and have tons of books sitting around that I haven't cracked yet. Like I said... everything is strange...

  I have a good friend who has been doing all kinds of extraordinary projects at her house. I am impressed.  I keep thinking that any minute I'll kick into gear, but so far it hasn't happened.  Between the ookey weather and the general weirdness, I don't have particularly high hopes.  I have been bird watching a lot... we have had some beautiful not so common visitors... a pair of Rose Breasted Grosbeaks and a pair of Baltimore Orioles.  Along with a couple of Indigo Buntings, loads of Cardinals and all the rest of the crew... wrens, titmouses, sparrows of all sorts, mourning doves, blue jays, chickadees,  nuthatches, Juncos, 4 kinds of woodpeckers... it's delightful.  I'm glad to have the time to enjoy them all and be part of their world.  I'm glad I live out in the country where most times are quiet and nothing disturbs the beautiful wildlife around me. Where at night it is so dark you can see all the stars. Where my soul feels at home. 

  Be well and stay safe my lovelies. 

4 comments:

DJan said...

I think everyone is pretty stressed these days. I'm glad to know you and your family are safe and healthy.

JACKIESUE said...

I am so busy chasing the little prince and I do mean chase..I don't have time to be stressed out..but the Goddess must have known I needed it cause today I woke up to gentle rain..and we don't have gentle rain in Texas..much needed.

Akannie said...

DJan... Hope you guys are too. It's weird, but I feel more depressed than stressed (I think). It's all too strange, isn't it ?

Akannie said...

JackieSue... Glad you guys are getting some much needed rain. We have had a LOT of rain this year. And the temps are chillier than normal.